Why I'm Glad We Don't Live in Shakespearean England (Or Modern-Day England, For That Matter)

The Times Online has a feature out today about the decline of good manners at West End theatres. Apparently, people are urinating onstage, fondling each other in bathroom stalls, texting, calling and being generally rowdy. What is everyone blaming? Low ticket prices and alcohol in the theatre.

First of all, we've talked about alcohol in the theatre before on this blog--twice. Personally, I don't think it makes any sense to allow alcohol into a theatre. I don't see people chugging beers at the movies. I'm all for banning alcohol in auditoriums. Once upon a time it was the norm for all food and drink to be banned during performance, and to me that makes sense. You can eat at the movies, but only because the sound is cranked up to a level where chewing isn't going to bother anyone too much. In live theatre, ear-splitting sound would be distracting and take away from the show.

Low ticket prices, though? How elitist can you be? I'm sure it's not just the poor folk being disrespectful. And I'm sure there are many who can't afford high ticket prices who are sitting completely respectfully, enjoying performances in a more mature way.

Of course, the article points out that back in Shakespeare's time, the groundlings used to jeer and throw things at performers...so really, we've come a long way, say the writers. That was also the time when being an actor was no better than being a prostitute, though, so rude behavior in the theatre made just a bit more sense. Also, back in Shakespeare's time, there was little in the way of sets and props. With the considerably more expensive and advanced production design of today, a return to rowdiness and boisterousness is also a major financial liability. Today, we are a more civilized society, people want to be able to hear what they paid to watch, and actor safety actually matters now. (For a counterargument from Carl Benson of the PianoFight blog, check out this past Chatterbox post.)

Events like the ones this Times article describes are a giant step backwards in theatre. Measures like installing bouncers are alarming (and maybe a little funny) because theatre is not a bar. There shouldn't need to be a police presence in a theatre. And asking that we leave the groundlings back in Elizabethan England isn't sanctimonious, it's common courtesy. I think we'd have far fewer aspiring theatre artists if having dinner scraps hurled at you were still a legitimate concern.

But blaming lower ticket prices is missing the point. Alcohol makes more sense as a cause for this rudeness, and perhaps the theatres are just too close to the pub district on the West End (I wouldn't know). So, London, take out the liquor inside the theatre and make sure the ticket takers look out for drunk patrons. And please, America, don't follow Britain's example. Theatre--and anything people have put work into, really--deserves more respect than that.